Look Back Before You Move Forward

This is the time of year where I pause to give myself a special gift. And, I want to encourage you to do the same.

I use this occasion to create time and space to reflect on all my experiences from the year. I honor the year by focusing on all that happened as a way to learn and free myself.

As I took stock of 2019, what I found was quite profound, so I am going to take the leap and share a few of my lessons with you.

As you might imagine, it was my toughest experiences—more accurately, my reactions to them—that taught me more than I ever set out to learn. But learn, I did. And for that, I am very grateful.

See, my kryptonite is feelings. Yes, of course the ability to feel emotions so deeply are also a gift. But when someone harshly criticizes me, or worse yet, shuts me out, I grasp and grasp for resolution until my metaphorical hands are raw. I so desperately want it to be all good, and it just isn’t. What happens next I guess you might call suffering.

You know this as well as I do, while I’m back here churning away having them in my head, testing out imaginary conversations I’ll likely never have, they’re doing their thing without worrying about me one bit.

Out of desperation maybe, I momentarily felt the power (and the freedom) in simply letting go. A voice whispered to me, “You can’t change them anyway. Why not have some peace of mind yourself?”

Three things emerged that helped ease my pain:
1. Noticing my reactions
2. Loving whatever that is
3. Imagining what else might be true

This was a real aha moment. Stopping to reflect and pay attention gave me so much. A respite from the uselessness of worry. A calmer mind. A breath of fresh air.

Give Yourself the Gift of Freedom and Peace of Mind
Use December to give yourself an amazing present of presence and reflection. This is the perfect time to look back on your 2019 and discover your essential lessons.

My wish for you is that you be kind to yourself as you stop and reflect. Be curious and gain real clarity.

Look inside yourself instead of wishing someone else would change.

Appreciate the emotions that emerge.

Consider new possibilities to move forward.

May this holiday season bring you much peace, love and joy.