What Sets You Off? Get In Tune with Your Emotions in the Heat of the Moment

 In Team Performance

What would your life be like if you could understand your feelings and manage your reactions better?

Ever walk into a meeting where someone innocently says something like, “Why would you ever do that?” You find yourself instantly filled with something bordering on rage. Like zero to 60 faster than any car you’ve ever driven.

It could be just that one word that sets you off. Or maybe it’s tone of voice. Or something that reminds you of some awful earlier experience. You likely don’t even realize why it happens. It just does.

We All Get Triggered.
Emotional triggers are an inevitable part of the human condition. They’re actually supposed to happen because we are literally wired to react to survive.

Some days it feels like you’re walking through an obstacle course filled with triggers and you’re trying your best to make sure nothing (and no one) gets set off.

To master these instinctive emotions more effectively, you have to show up with curiosity and compassion to what you are experiencing.

What’s going on inside you provides all the wisdom you need.

The key is to be aware you’re being triggered (or else there’s not one thing you’re going to do about it).

Start by looking for early warning signs such as your heart racing, your skin sweating or your voice getting louder.

Pay close attention to any internal clues and if you detect them, chances are, you are about to get hijacked.

You actually have the power to lean away from the noise in your mind. You can slow things down by taking a time out and calming down.

Three Steps to Shift Your State of Mind
1. Relax
Breathe in for five counts and exhale for five counts (do this three times and watch with wonder).

2. Be Present
Appreciate one thing you’re really grateful for (like, wow, I can hear all the sounds in this room right now).

3.  Focus
Circle high above the drama you’re in, and remove yourself for just a second to discover what’s really important to you (like your family, friends or home).

By going inward and calming your mind, you can safely reenter the scene you were just in to move forward.

No one is a real threat.

Everyone is just as human (and vulnerable) as you are.

Now you can respond with a clearer mind and a much more open heart.

When you get in tune with your emotions in real time, you can be far more effective when your hot buttons do get pushed.

Instead of your instincts managing you, you become the master of your emotions.